Top 5 Tips To Have An Amazing Labor Day Weekend

Labor Day weekend is upon us, let the celebration begin!

Before we begin, please Google "Why do we celebrate Labor Day", then pat your hard working self on the back and get ready to PARTY!

Top 5 Tips To Having An Amazing Labor Day Weekend:

1.  Don't tell your party guests you're serving them Impossible Burgers unless you want to hear Uncle Thibadeaux's rant about how imitation meat is a deep state conspiracy to thin the herd by giving us cancer.

2. Ignore your colon when it begins to whimper after your ninth hot dog.  Pound on it and scream out loud, "If Joey Chesnutt can do it, I can too!".

3. Hire a DJ for your pool party.  Just don't let any of your white friends dance.  Especially when they get drunk and the only two songs they're requesting are I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry and Barbie Girl by Aqua!

4. Guys, if  you find your party's too much of a sausage fest, crack open a Truly.  White women can hear that sound from a mile and a half away.  It's like a hummingbird feeder for chicks.

5. Here's a fun game to play. Watch Dave Chappelle's new stand-up special and take a shot every time you're offended.