So it's not directly from Amazon, but the fact they're calling them "straws" is hilarious. Before we get into this, let me explain what you are looking at. The more official title is a Pizzo, but the street name is more commonly referred to as a "Love Rose". The "Love Rose" name comes from the fact you can typically buy them in gas stations with a fake rose stuck inside of the vessel that makes it a vase for said rose. Pull the rose out, and you've got yourself a fancy new pipe to freebase all of your drug paraphernalia. However, if you look around on Amazon, you'll find them to be "drinking straws".

Firstly, how in the heck are you going to actually use this as a straw if you actually think that's what this is? I literally can imagine my mother looking around on Amazon thinking, "Oh that's a fancy straw", and buying an 8 pack of them. The picture shows the "bubble" end going into the beverage and you put your lips around the smaller end. Well, that is how one is used, but it's not particularly used for a refreshing beverage while sitting by the pool. It's mostly used as a refreshing way to freebase behind the dumpster of a gas station.

Amazon, OPTTGACY
Amazon, OPTTGACY
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The item description is pretty comical on its own

  • It is a perfect gift for your friends
  • Can be used for a period of time
  • East to clean, not afraid of fire
  • Reuseable and easy to carry

The other part that got me was the "buy it with" section below. Usually, Amazon suggests other items to go along with the particular item that others order with it.

Amazon, OPTTGACY
Amazon, OPTTGACY
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Yea, I prefer my iced beverages heated up by a torch with spare butane canisters on standby for those late weekend nights that I run out by mistake.

The "drinking straw" has 4.5 stars out of 5 but there are no actual reviews of the product. I did see another similar product that said their milkshake tasted a smidge "methy" when using the straw. Well played.

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