Boyfriend ‘Furious’ After Finding Out Girlfriend Was Surrogate for Her Sister
A woman was a surrogate for her sister after the sibling experienced years of fertility struggles, but now her boyfriend is upset.
The woman took to Reddit explaining when she was 20 she decided to be a surrogate for her sister. She had a little girl, who is now 7.
She explained she has no maternal feelings towards her niece. "I've never felt I was anything but the handy oven for that bun," she wrote via Reddit.
After dating her current boyfriend for a couple years she told him she didn't want any children. "He wanted kids but we talked it over and he decided he could live without kids," she explained.
Recently at a party celebrating her dad's birthday, her family brought out old family photos. In one of the pics her boyfriend noticed she was pregnant, which puzzled him.
"He was upset and asked me what this was and thought I'd had a child and gave them up," she shared. "I explained to him that my older sister and her husband had been struggling with fertility and she'd had several miscarriages so I offered to carry their child for them and my 7-year-old niece was the result of this."
Although she explained the situation to her boyfriend, he was still furious that she never told him.
"I never brought it up before as I didn't think it mattered and it was so long ago that it wasn't really anyone else's business," she wrote. "He however feels differently and when we left he told me I should have told him and said how it wasn't fair I'd been willing to give my sister a child but wouldn't even consider having one with him."
She got "upset," writing that "there is a big difference between carrying a child and raising a child and told him as much ... I told him I was sorry for not telling him but I honestly hadn't felt it was his business as it had been years before we got together, I then reminded him how he had been the one to say he could live without children as I'd warned him long ago."
The woman noted her boyfriend was still upset with her, though she didn't believe she did anything wrong.
Users flooded the comments section, with many noting that having children is still an unresolved issue between the two.
"Something I don't think should get lost in the weeds is that he clearly still wants children and this is a huge compatibility issue," one person wrote.
Another commented: "You and your boyfriend are incompatible. I would break up with him so he has a chance to meet someone who wants to have children. It sucks as alllll hell to do this, I’ve been through it, but it’s so much better than investing more into the relationship (engagement, marriage, buying a home, etc.) and then having it fall apart because your partner is harboring resentment about not having children."