There are a lot of questions out there about how to best protect your family. Do you buy a gun? Do you install a home security system? Maybe you install a Redneck Security System and save some money.

flickr/ Jermjus

It's very simple, cost effective and safe. Here is how the Redneck Security system works.

1. Go to Goodwill and buy a pair of size 14-16 men's work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo
Magazine.

3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads .....
Bubba,
Me and Marcel, Donnie Ray and Jimmy Earl went for more ammo and beer. Be
back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls. They got the mailman
this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part,
but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four
of 'em in the house. Better wait outside. Be right back.
-- Cooter