I went to quite a few parties during the holidays, but on new years day, I had a chance to be by myself and reflect on a few things. Now, you might think I'm about to talk about being a better person and losing weight or something like that, but the truth of the matter is, I sat around the house, watched the Twilight Zone Marathon and just had some random thoughts that had nothing at all to do with inner reflection.

Here are just a few of the things that occurred to me:

Crest and Unisom should merge and make a toothpaste that helps you sleep at night.

Spongebob works in the fast food business yet can afford his own house.

World War III will probably start in the "comments" section on YouTube

Sometimes I wonder if my life is in shambles because of all the chain letters that I never forwarded to ten of my closest friends.

I wonder what people do with all the extra time they have from typing "u" not "you"

Is using Internet Explorer to download Bing considered a betrayal?

This year will be the first time people born in this century can legally drive a car.

I'm more comfortable speaking my mind to thousands  of strangers on the radio than the people I see in real life

And finally, one inspired by my dog, Hank:

What if he needs glasses and I just don't know it?